THE ROSENFELDS
By Helen Belitsky
If you had visited the storefront in the Cooper Corners shopping center, Chabad occupied up until 2001, at 9 a. m. on a Shabbat morning, you would have witnessed a bustling duo getting ready for the Shabbat minyan. Chairs had to be set up, crackers had to be put out for the
Kiddush, and most important in those days, men had to be rounded up to make a minyan. Martin Rosenfeld and Mendy were on the job….
Today, the storefront has been long abandoned, the chairs are already set up, and the Shabbat minyan is going strong. But Helen and Martin Rosenfeld are still on the job. The dynamic duo have been counted on through the years for the daily, Shabbat, and yom tov minyanim, women’s programming, kiddush reservations, JLI classes, men's club events, and women's studies, just to list a few.
Philadelphia natives, Martin and Helen are, respectively, second and third generation Philadelphians, raised in Winfield and Oxford Circle respectively, predominantly Jewish neighborhoods where the school principal at each of their elementary schools would visit classrooms before not only the high holidays but Sukkot and Simchat Torah as well, asking if anyone would be in school (not, according to Helen, who would be absent!)
“Anyone who is familiar with Philadelphia neighborhoods knows how separated one section of the city is from another, recalls Helen. “Yet, without my knowing it, Martin lived across the street from my grandmother. I remember the corner candy store where he hung out.” Bashert? We’ll soon find out.
Both went to B’nai Brith dances, both went to Temple University, but it wasn’t until May, l971, when a friend invited Helen to a singles night for Jewish professionals at the Woodbine Inn that the two met. “Five weeks later we were engaged,” says Helen. “And five months after that we were married. So much for my wild single life.”
Their Cherry Hill life began, and so, too, did Helen’s career, as a mother and math teacher, later educational administrator. Daughter Naomi was born in 1974. Helen taught statistics at Peirce College, in Philadelphia where she remained for 23 years, retiring in 2001, having risen through the years to the position as vice president for enrollment. Martin worked for the Department of Housing and Urban Development for 38 years progressing through various positions from appraiser to financial analyst before retiring in 2005.
The Rosenfeld’s path to a spiritual and religious life was fraught with exploration, adventure, courage and change, ending in a deep commitment to ritual, study and synagogue affiliation at Chabad. When daughter Naomi was 5, they joined Beth Jacob-Beth Israel synagogue in Merchantville. “I had never belonged to a synagogue, and Martin was skeptical, to say the least,” recalls Helen. “But being Martin, he decided that since he was paying dues, he was going to get his money’s worth,” she laughs.
“We went to a Friday night service one week,” she reminisces. “ It was nice. The next Friday night, I saw Martin getting dressed up after dinner. I asked him where he was going.” “We’re going to services,” he answered promptly. “But we did that last week,” I countered. “Shabbos comes every week,” he explained. “Oh boy. The first step in what has turned out to be a wonderful journey,” laughs Helen.
Like many families today, the Rosenfelds journey to an observant life was inspired and reinforced by their daughter Naomi’s journey, which began at age 8 in Camp Ramah. Enthused by Judaism, she became an active USY’er, serving as president of her chapter at Beth El and going on to leadership at the regional level. By the time she became a senior in high school, recalls Helen, Naomi knew she was ready for a more serious Jewish experience. She found it at Binghamton University, and was the first in the family to have a significant encounter with Chabad.
Through her relationship with Rabbi Aaron and Rivky Slonim, Chabad directors, her knowledge, commitment and level of observance deepened, relates her Mom. “Rivky Slonim became her mentor and second mother,” asserts Helen.
As part of Naomi’s bashert university experience, she met an attractive young man with the same last name as hers, Ari Rosenfeld, during her first year at the university. Ari grew up in Flatbush and had graduated from the well-known Yeshivah of Flatbush. “He’s all around terrific,” says his mother-in-law. They married six years later. “They live in Livingston, N. J. and have two adorable children,” says Helen. “Just ask me.”
A big step in the Rosenfeld journey to observant Judaism was the decision to keep kosher. Anyone who has made that commitment, knows how important and difficult a transformation that is. The Rosenfelds were no exception.
Anyone who has accepted Rosenfeld hospitality will attest to the fact that Helen is a really good cook, but Helen demurs. “I wasn’t then, and still am not, much of a good cook. I am totally intimidated by kosher butchers. So I resisted the change at first. But one day in 1989, I was in Shop Rite and noticed an array of Empire chickens all wrapped up just like the non-kosher brands I had been buying. Okay, now what excuse could I use? So Martin and I threw out all the dishes, utensils and pots, read how to kasher the appliances, and started all over again. I felt like a bride!
The next significant step in the Rosenfelds’ journey to observant Judaism came when their synagogue, Beth Jacob-Beth Israel folded.
They joined Beth El, but a serendipitous ad in the Voice about the opening of Chabad in its early storefront location caught their eye. Chabad, of course, was appealing to the Rosenfelds given their daughter’s experience at college. Martin decided to check it out. He went once—and never looked back.
“I started to attend shortly after Martin,” recalls Helen, “but I wasn’t a regular by any means. At first the mechitzah bothered me. I was used to sitting with Martin and relying on him to help me follow the service. Now I had to fend for myself. But Mendy was so welcoming and not at all intimidating. I was sold.”
By the time Mendy moved Chabad to Kresson Road, the Rosenfelds were completely entrenched in the Chabad family. They treasure their Chabad connection, in all respects.
“We’re delighted by the warm and friendly people we have met, the encouragement and opportunity to learn in a relaxed, interesting setting, the traditional approach to Judaism that enriches our lives. Mendy and Dinie have become a vital part of our family. All of this we have found at Chabad.”
For the Rosenfelds, their Chabad adventure has marked significant “firsts” in their lives: a first wedding, as Naomi’s wedding was the first time they married off a child, and the first time Mendy officiated at a wedding; a first funeral, when Mendy officiated at Martin’s father’s funeral ll years ago; a first time dining at a sukkah, which also turned out to be Dinie’s first time hosting a dinner in their family sukkah. “Who was more nervous?” recalls Helen. “Me.”
“While incredibly rewarding for us as a family,” Helen says, “our spiritual growth has not been an easy journey. We had to cope with family and friends who were less than supportive, and with a work environment that didn’t appreciate that we now needed more time off for religious holidays and Shabbos. We made the adjustments we could at the time, but were never really satisfied. We needed to wait for retirement to do more.”
There were other difficult hurdles, she recalls. “Our parents never really accepted the change in our lives, and we no longer see most of the friends we knew from the first half of our lives. “Is it worth it?” she asks herself from time to time. “I wish it could have been easier—less conflict and strife.
“But without a doubt, a resounding YES,” she answers.